Sunday, February 9, 2014

To Whom It May Concern

To Whom It May Concern:

Thank you for bringing me back to reality that we live in a crazy world. A place where I was under the impression I had a voice that mattered.

Recently we have been battling boundary issues with our school district.  As many of you know we have three children in our elementary school system right now.  When we purchased our home 8 years ago we chose a home that was in an established neighborhood that SHES was built for. In those 8 years we have made improvements to our home and to our family by adding three more children into the mix. Never in my mind would I have thought our family would be moving to a new school.

Nothing is official. But there isn’t much to hold on to. In my mind, we are moving.

A little background… There were at one point 4 plans on the board. The school board laid out goals to accomplish with each scenario one being keeping neighborhoods together. One meeting laid out plans 1 and 2.  The first plan had little parts of neighborhoods picked a part, the second plan had a bigger neighborhood slated to move.  Putting it nicely, people were not happy with these plans. At the next meting, plans 3 and 4 were introduced.

Enter blindside here.

I was in total shock that our area, the community SHES was built for, was being targeted for moving schools. Plan 3, includes our home to move to another school in our district. This plan has been the popular plan ever since 1,2, and 4 were taken off, or maybe not, I don’t know (little confusing depending on who you talk to) which is on, off, or in outer space at this point. But, again 3 is still ON.

Quoted by a board member, all of our schools are of great quality.  I have to believe this even though I have no contact, friendships, relationships, or anything built at this new school.  We will be uprooting a 3rd grader, kindergartner, and possible pre-schooler to a new school with our oldest adjusting to her own new adventure, called middle school. It’s not about the school. Let me repeat…it’s not about the school.

I know it isn’t the end of the world.  At this moment it seems like it.

I am past the royal pissed off stage in this fight to keep our neighborhood in SHES. I say this but tomorrow could be different as the board rolls out 2 more plans, in which I am thinking we will be a part of both.  I am coming to grips with the fact my voice isn’t being heard, policies won’t be followed, and everyone will continue to tell me, “no matter where your kids go, they will adjust”.  (said no board member ever)

I have moved on to sad, hurt, helpless, and picked on part of this fight to keep our neighborhood in SHES. No matter what happens, the boundary issue will make people upset. I get this. However, at this point, it is the politics behind it that is making me hurt for our kids, our neighborhood, and our school, whichever one it will be.  I am sad because the friendships with teachers, community I know, and relationships I have with SHES will no longer be there. SHES will no longer be my families school that we started when Gaby was 5 years old. It won’t be the school that my children completed milestones in. I won’t be going to the same carnivals, back to school nights, and basket auctions. It won’t be our HOME school.

Now it will be different.

This will not hurt my 6th grader. She will have her own adventure and new start to focus on as she goes to the middle school.

My 3rd grader will not bounce back easily. Kids are resilient. Yes. Kids are also creatures of habit. And to my 9 year old, this is her school home, all she knows.  Kadyn has shed many tears as we talk about the change that will/could take place.  We are not staff or work for the school; we have no choice where to take our kids. We cannot pick our school. As many of you have followed Kadyn’s journey, you will know her IEP has been 2 years in the making. Two years of developing relationships with people that see your child more Monday- Friday then I do.  She does not make friends easily nor is she popular in school.  She is just a kid that does the best that she can each day that she is there.

My kindergartner is crazy. We were blessed that she entered SHES as a peer for their preschool. She loves her teachers and speaks often of them. Even though I do not want to move her, as kindergarten was tough enough to adjust to, in my heart, I think she will soar wherever.

My heart is with SHES. It is the school that helped me become the parent that I have become for good or bad. It has helped me build relationships that I have. And it has sat the bar high for the next school we attend. I will miss the teachers that I have grown to love. I will always speak highly of them and their dedication to our Fluke children. To the teachers… I owe so much to you! Each of my kids carries influences from each of their teachers past and present.

But to whom it may concern… I have learned a lot of life lessons from this experience.  So, thank you?? My children will always be worth fighting for. Win or lose, I will make the best of the situation.  People really do show true colors when change is on the rise. When stressed, I know who my true friends are.  I really do live in a community that came together to fight for our “hood”. I am still super excited to serve a school, no matter, what school, with this community. I am gullible.  (that’s not new, I just put too much trust into people) I will not hold this against anyone, maybe at first, but whatever. Most important lesson to learn, re-learn, and re-re-learn again is that my child(ren) are not in my hands, teachers’ or school boards…. They are in God’s hands.

I don’t yet know what my overall,”Ah-ha” lesson is to be learned from this is. I can certainly guess though… see above paragraph. But God’s got it and I can’t handle stressing over it any more. (it makes me grumpy, head achs, teary and lose weight- well that last one is ok)

I would LOVE nothing more to go to the work session tomorrow to find out there is a magical plan that doesn’t move families of plan 2 and plan 3,3a, 3b or whatever we are calling it now. And I will still spend most of tonight in prayer about this happening. (this is where I try to live in a perfect world)

The best thing I can close with is if/when/ this change comes I know their will be tears, there will be hurt feelings, and there will be emotional times as we close out the year at SHES.  I know we will be ok. I know my kids will soar,  thrive and I know I will build new relationships.  The past two weeks has made me look at, sort through, and really think what is important.  It has made us stronger.

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